


Grooves In My Skin

by aver_no



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Needs a Hug, Ficlet, I actually like Janus quite a bit, but for the sake of the angst he's kind of villainized, but seriously someone give Roman a hug, post-episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24033943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aver_no/pseuds/aver_no
Summary: After sinking out of Thomas's living room, Roman just wants to be numb. He just wishes he would stop being confused, stop hurting, stop feeling.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 58





	Grooves In My Skin

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic!! Any pointers would be super appreciated!

_“Everything’s gonna be okay kiddo. We love you.”_

_“Right.”_

Roman’s mind was on overdrive and all he felt was an ache in his chest and all he heard were lies on repeat, over and over inside his head, and he couldn’t fight them off, he couldn’t laugh them away.

The door to his room opened and closed and he barely felt the cold of the doorknob on his palm. Aimlessly Roman wandered to his bed, just wanting to block out the world, to hide away, to be numb for just a moment. Because that was the problem. He wasn’t numb. He _felt_ hurt, and he _felt_ angry, and he _felt_ betrayed because how else is he supposed to feel when Thomas doesn’t believe in him and Patton is wrong and Deceit is right about _so many wrong things?_ How else is he supposed to feel when he can’t seem to get it right?

Roman’s eyes burned and there was a wet spot on his cheek, but he didn’t wipe it away. _Nobody’s around anyway._ A river of saltwater flowed along the planes of his face, probably carving grooves into the skin but who cared at this point.

“Knock knock.” Roman buried his head further into his pillow and willed Patton to leave him alone.

“Roman? Kiddo? You in there?” Roman bunched his plush blankets over his head, feeling a bit like a child but what does it matter. “Bud, we _do_ love you. No one could be further from Remus than you. You’re _good_.” Silence. “We love you, alright? Thomas loves you. You’re important to us.”

Roman wished he could shut his mind against the words, the _lies_ that were just there to make him feel better. The deceit. He was so tired of being played with and being tricked and being manipulated to do things he _thought_ were right but weren’t but now are and he’s so _confused_ and _lost_ and-

“Okay Roman. Try to get some sleep tonight.”

If sleep found him, it would be a mercy.


End file.
